Well I am awful sorry I made you all wait so long for the report. I am free of brain mets. That is a big whew! right? After a lot of very good discussion my oncologist and I came to a treatment outline we can both ( hopefully) live with. First, I found out there are two good size lesions on my liver of 1.2 cm. and 2+cm. plus several others that are under a cm. That’s not good. After discussing radiation and brachytherapy, Dr. Demichelle carefully explained that radiation will kill what is in the liver but not what is floating all rebel bat out of hell style through my bloodstream. For this reason chemotherapy is still the best option. Also surgery to remove the cancer in my lymph nodes in my neck would be painful and a tricky surgery. Radiation to that area would severely impact my quality of life.
So we were back to chemotherapy options. I pointed out that in recent months I finally began to feel good. I am interested in a bit of quality time with the kids. Before Alec goes away to school at the end of the summer. I just wanted to feel like I have some time to complete things and be with the kids. Dr. Demichelle thought it would be best to wait and do a medicine called Xeloda now. It is an oral medicine that I take for 2 weeks and then I am off for a week.It has milder side effects than the other medicines she wanted to try. However, there are still side effects. My nails will likely rip and tear again. My hands and feet may turn red and become sore. And the dreaded “D” will be a constant as it was with my other chemo.
She feels like this chemo has a good chance of stopping my cancer.If it doesn’t work we will move onto adryamicin. For now, I am hoping this new medicine will work. I plan on using this time to prepare to be sick though too, in case it doesn’t. I want to take the kids and Kelly on a family vacation. I have NEVER gone on vacation with my family. We have never gone anywhere as a family. Mostly because it is very costly. I have checked out three websites that provide assistance in wish fulfillment for terminally ill patients. Some of them may work, but they are all time suckers. I think we may end up down the shore for a week but that suits me just fine. I plan on taking them out of school for 3 days at the end of April. My doctor even agreed that we do not really know how much time I have and that I should do it now while I can.
I am deeply relieved to not have brain mets. I am relieved to be holding off on the red devil if only for 6 weeks. I pray to God that the new medicine will work. I pray that my cancer takes a holiday too. My cancer and death can go on a long holiday together and leave me alone for a while. My doctor said I know its hard to live your life in 6 week intervals but that is what we have to do. So now every 6 weeks I will be scanned until I am stable. I hope you like drama because there is plenty to come. Nail biting for all. Thank you all for sharing this journey with me. Thank you for your prayers and support. Thank you for reading.