Not long after Andrea died, I had a dream. I was at a sparely populated party and Andrea appeared in the room. No one else seemed to notice. She came up to me and said that she wanted to say goodbye and to acknowledge how awkward our last interaction was. We talked about how awkward death can be and how no one really knows what to do. She told me that she didn’t have much time, because she needed to get back to her grave before her body started to fall apart. I said that I thought she had been cremated. She told me that she only wanted people to think that because she wanted to avoid a big dramatic episode at the site. I laughed. She gave me a big hug and then she went away.
I often dream of Andrea. I think of her when I am alone printing in the darkroom at three in the morning and other random times. I didn’t know what we were getting into when we first started this project. I thought this was going to be a weird chapter in our lives that we would move on from and think back on. Even now my rib cage feels like it is shrinking.
I am working on a project that started out as a pretty personal project using images and sounds that I gathered over the last two years, a mingling of images, voices and stories. I am realizing that the story is much more than just me, but that it involves an entire community. I would like to incorporate other voices and memories into the project as well.
Here is a link to a rough prototype of the project just to give you an idea: http://punkrockmommy.org/memories/ The reason for all of the layers is that I want to create sense of something that is there, but it is fluid, something you can’t quite grasp. Maybe a piece like this will have value to others – maybe not. Just to explain the interface…you click on the stars to move through the piece…the mouse controls the audio levels (there is sound!) and the star at the top left will make the piece go into fullscreen.
Anyway, I’m open to any feedback you may have. I hope that this can be another way of honoring her. Even if you don’t want to record yourself talking feel free to comment on this post and write your memory there. And yes, a book based on the blog may be happen as well, but not just yet…
Peace to you,